


Inessential

by xXPokeFictionXx_Is_A_Horrible_Username



Series: Soudam Week 2018 Continuations [2]
Category: Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Existential Crisis, M/M, Mastermind Soda Kazuichi, Paranoia, Reunions, Swearing, Ultimate Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Ultimate Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-15
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2020-05-12 06:22:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19223413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXPokeFictionXx_Is_A_Horrible_Username/pseuds/xXPokeFictionXx_Is_A_Horrible_Username
Summary: Kazuichi Souda, a boy who most students on Jabberwock Island considered to be cowardly and annoying, was secretly the mastermind. At first, he was happy with this fate, finding the position absolutely thrilling. But when he realizes that his former comrades's hope is rubbing off on him, he starts to wonder if his love of despair is inessential. He begins to panic, and ends up making a decision that would change his life.Junko had left no instruction manual for how to deal with letting a blackened student survive. And with his affection for his friends growing and the truth creeping ever closer to being revealed, what was Kazuichi to do?He almost wished he could've just had his memory wiped like everyone else.(Note: This is a continuation from my Soudam Week 2018 work, Day Four. Yes, I know it's been literally over half a year. I'm sorry. The first chapter will just be the same as it was in the Soudam Week collection for now. Again, so sorry I took so long, hope you all enjoy it anyway!)





	1. Realization

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't edit this bit, maybe I will later, but whatever. It was originally supposed to be a oneshot, so sorry if it's rushed in some places. I hope you enjoy it anyway!

Kazuichi Souda, in all honesty, was having a terrific day. Everyone was together in the amazing Fun House, and the next motive had been given.

Now, one might wonder why any of that would be considered “terrific” by the mechanic. He was one of the most paranoid people here, and he was small, so most would assume that he wouldn’t last long in this situation, mentally or physically.

But that’s where most people were wrong. Kazuichi had actually had his fair share of experience with starvation. He had no doubt that he’d be able to take the pain of it all better than anyone. And the reason why was simple.

He was the mastermind.

Just the thought of it caused Kazuichi’s face to break out into a bright grin. It was really amazing that no one had figured out yet. He must’ve been a pretty good actor.

Who knew that simply putting on a cowardly persona and faking a crush could do so much to hide his identity?

In any case, the killing game was thrilling. He couldn’t believe that he got to be right in the middle of it all.

It was extremely unsafe, in terms of his plan. He could be killed at any moment, and then everything would stop. It’d be terrible, the worst case scenario.

But oh, the despair he brought himself just at the thought of it…

Kazuichi shuddered. It was absolutely delightful.

He was having such fun doing all of this. The thrill of being right in the middle of it all was amazing, and witnessing the other student’s despair first-hand was thrilling. Not to mention the despair he was able to subtly inflict on everyone else.

Sonia, of course, was his most popular victim. He had nothing against her, really, but she was the best option for him to fake a crush on. And simply taking that crush too far was enough to cause the girl such pain, such fear of him. It was thrilling.

Yes, thrilling…

Kazuichi’s smile faded a bit. Whatever, Sonia’s despair wasn’t what he should be focusing on right now. He had other things to do.

He glanced around one more time, and put the code into the wall in front of him. Most people might think that a keypad in the wall was cliche, and very risky to keep in the building, but Kazuichi wasn’t convinced. The keypad was across the whole wall, and no buttons lit up if they were pressed. He didn’t think that anyone would be able to find it if they tried.

Kazuichi grinned as a secret entrance opened. The code in the wall had taken a while to memorize, and the first few times Kazuichi tried to access it he’d messed up the code, but he was getting a lot better at it now that he was consistently inside of the Fun House.

He walked through the small hallway, and pressed a button so that the wall would close behind him. He strolled through the area with a wide grin, looking out into the other rooms of the Fun House.

The hallway was made of one-way glass. So, Kazuichi could look out at everyone, but no one could look in.

He was just going on a patrol right now. There was no particular reason for him to be here, but it was good to check up on things every so often. He might see something amazing, after all.

Eventually, he made his way into the Fun House’s camera room. The Fun House cameras were only connected to this room, since after this motive was over, Kazuichi was sure that no one would ever want to enter this place again. He’d stop them even if they tried.

Being able to control Monokuma had a lot of perks.

He grinned as he entered the room, hopping onto his office chair and spinning it around a few times, giggling.

After the chair came to a stop, he calmed down a bit. Then he froze, realizing his mistake. His smile faded once more.

He was a member of the Ultimate Despair, he was supposed to be more mature than this. He shouldn’t be taking pleasure out of something so tame, so lacking in despair.

Kazuichi sighed, and started looking through his cameras.

Alright, everything in Grape House seemed to be calm. The girls were mostly sleeping, and Hajime seemed to be having a nightmare. Kazuichi paused, feeling a strange emotion well up inside of him watching his acquaintance _~~(friend)~~_ writhe in pain before him.  

Kazuichi did his best to snap himself out of it. This was the despair he’d wanted, he should be enjoying this. So why wasn’t this weird feeling going away? He should… enjoy…

Kazuichi shut off the camera. He’d turn it back on later. Yeah, it’d be fine.

Kazuichi turned his attention back to the cameras, looking over Strawberry House this time. It seemed like everyone was sleeping, except for…

Kazuichi squinted. Huh, that was weird. What was Fuyuhiko doing awake? He seemed to be trying to relax in the lounge, although Kazuichi had no idea why. And wait…

Where were Nekomaru and Gundham? 

Kazuichi’s eyes widened. They were both missing.

“Holy shit, no way…” Kazuichi muttered to himself, eyes darting to the other camera feeds. They weren’t anywhere in Strawberry House, or Grape House. They probably weren’t in the bathroom, but Kazuichi couldn’t be sure, since there were no cameras in there. They weren’t in the Final Dead Room…

Kazuichi turned his attention to the Fruit Tower camera, and his eyes widened. There they were, fighting, right there in the tower. Nekomaru was throwing out punches, trying to hit Gundham, but the other was too fast, being much more agile than Nekomaru.

Kazuichi felt his heart beat faster, and his hands begin to shake. A strong feeling welled up inside of him, but it wasn’t despair. It was… excitement? No, not that. Boredom? No, no, it wasn’t that, so what could it be?   
  


~~_(Terror.)_ ~~

  
Kazuichi began to panic. What was wrong, what was happening to him?

He had to see it! That’s right, he had to see this in person, that’s what this was. He was just worried that he’d miss this wonderful, despair-inducing moment, that was all, totally.

Kazuichi dashed into the hallway, and made his way to where his window into the Fruit Tower was. As it came into view, Kazuichi slowed down, and pressed himself against the glass, trying to get a good look at what was going on.

His eyes widened.

Holy shit.

Just as the cameras had shown him, Nekomaru and Gundham were fighting. Nekomaru was trying his best to hit his opponent, but Gundham didn’t relent, continuing to dodge. It was an incredible battle, two powerful forces clashing together in a battle worthy to be called Ultimate.

It was incredible.

~~_(It was terrifying.)_ ~~

~~~~  
  
It filled him with… despair.

Despair?

Was that the right word to call this feeling? Despair? Yes, no, this was despair, definitely…

_~~(So why didn’t it feel… good?)~~ _

_~~(It almost felt as if he was back to normal being a normal high school student, feeling despair the way everyone else did.)~~ _

_~~(How… Concerning.)~~ _

  
  
Kazuichi watched the fight with wide eyes. Both of the competitors were giving it their all, and one wrong move from either of them would mean the end of the battle.

It was Nekomaru who made the first mistake.   
  
He’d ended up stumbling after a particularly hard swing, and his momentary lack of balance had been all the leeway his opponent needed. In one swift motion, Gundham was behind Nekomaru, and before the robot could react, he’d given a swift chop to the Goodnight Button on his neck.

Nekomaru collapsed, and Gundham looked a horrified, despite being the one to deliver the blow.

Kazuichi was sure that he was wearing a similar expression.

Gundham seemed to shiver a bit, before opening up Nekomaru’s chest and seemingly setting an alarm. After doing so, he grabbed a wire. He began to tie up the robot, a dark expression on his face while he did so.

Kazuichi’s eyes widened. He stared at the breeder with terror in his eyes, wondering what he was going to do next.

Soon, he found out. Gundham tied a loop onto the end of the rope, and hung it onto the door. He then proceeded to Grape House, breaking the door to the Fruit Tower from Strawberry house before leaving.

Kazuichi realized what the breeder’s plan was once he re-entered the tower from Grape House. The mechanic watched as the robot was slowly lifted into the air as the floor sank downwards. His eyes widened as he watched Nekomaru dangle far above the floor as Gundham entered the room.

The breeder looked to his work with a dark look on his face. Everything had gone according to plan, by the looks of it. He almost wished that it hadn’t.

The breeder walked out of the room with a solemn look on his face, breaking the elevator at Grape House before retreating back to Strawberry House through the secret entrance.

The secret entrance, of course, wasn’t connected to Kazuichi’s secret hallways at all. That would be stupid. So, for now, Gundham was out of his sight.

Kazuichi pressed a hand to his chest. His knees felt weak, so he sat down. He felt like he was starting to hyperventilate.

What was wrong with him?   
  
He should be happy right now. This was one of the most despair-inducing plans he’d seen so far, it was sickening, evil, he should have loved it! It was amazing, intelligent, so why wasn’t he cheering Gundham on?   
  
Why was he only terrified of what was to come…?

_~~(Kazuichi really liked Nekomaru, he was a good guy. Kazuichi had made his new body single handedly, he’d done his best to make sure that the coach would live, and now here he was, dying again a few days later? It was horrible, he hated this!)~~ _

_~~(And Gundham… Kazuichi liked Gundham a lot, too! Even if he pretended to hate the breeder, he was actually rather amused by the boy’s antics! He didn’t want Gundham to be found out and executed!)~~ _

_~~(... Not to mention the funny feelings he got whenever the other boy was around. The strange fluttering in his chest and the warmth in his stomach, while being a bit annoying, wasn’t something that Kazuichi wanted to be gone. He didn’t want Gundham to be gone!)~~ _

_~~(He didn’t want them to die!)~~ _

~~~~  
  
(He didn’t want them to…)

  
  
He didn’t…

He didn’t want them to die.

Oh god.

Kazuichi began to shiver. Shit, no, this wasn’t right! What was happening to him?! He was supposed to be part of the Ultimate Despair, he was supposed to enjoy this! Why wasn’t enjoying this?! He didn’t want this to happen, he didn’t want any more of his friends to die!

  
Friends…?

  
  
Oh god, it’s _their_ faults. They must’ve rubbed off on him! He swore under his breath. Of course. All of their stupid comforting words, all of their dumb reassurance, their _hope_ , they’d tried to take him away from despair! And it was working! He didn’t crave despair any more, what was wrong with him?!

  
God, he was so weak. He had always been weak, it only made sense that he’d broken out of his despair so easily! Any other members of despair could’ve dealt with this easily, this was pathetic! Just a few weeks of being with his friends had broken him out of his despair?

Wait… friends?

They’re his… friends?

  
  
They’re his friends. He liked his friends.

  
He shouldn’t have friends! He didn’t deserve friends, why did he have friends?!

  
  
“Oh god.” He muttered. “Something’s wrong with me, this isn’t good… I don’t want this, I don’t, I don’t…”

Kazuichi felt himself succumbing to despair.

But… it didn’t feel good. Not at all.

What was wrong with him…?

* * *

 

 

Gundham stood in the middle of the savanna with a heavy heart. It was time for him to leave this world. Although he always knew that it would end up happening eventually, he didn’t think it’d be so soon.

He gently placed his Four Dark Devas Of Destruction on a rock in front of him. He would’ve tried to climb it himself if he were more desperate, but Gundham was calm enough to realize that there was no way that he’d be able to climb on it.

There was enough space in a crevice of the rock for his Dark Devas, but the rock itself didn’t have enough footholds for Gundham to climb it. The breeder was grateful that his subordinates would make it out of here, at the very least.

He walked through the savanna absentmindedly, before finding a stick. He took it, but as his hand touched the ground, he felt a strange pounding shaking the earth. He looked up, noticing a stampede of raging beasts coming towards him.

Ah. So that was how he’d be killed. Ironic.

Gundham decided that before he’d be executed, he should perform a dark ritual to ensure the downfall of the mastermind. Normally, he wouldn’t perform a curse like this, since it’d require a hefty sacrifice in blood.

But, since he was about to die, he may as well make sure his mortal body may go to good use.

  
He began tracing the familiar spell circle into the dirt. The pounding of hooves only grew closer, but Gundham didn’t look up. He knew he was about to die already, he didn’t need to see it.

Suddenly, he felt a weight on his shoulder. He flinched, looking at the point of contact with wide eyes.

A sparrow.

It chirped at him, before flying away. He watched it, confused.

Suddenly, his eyes widened. It landed on a tree, at the top of a steep hill that Gundham was certain wasn’t there before.

If he could get up there, perhaps…

He looked to the stick in his hand, the approaching beasts, and the hill. He could either complete his blood ritual, or throw it all away in one last desperate attempt to survive.

Gundham began to run. It was an insult to life itself to merely give up, after all, so despite how hopeless it seemed, he’d have to try.

The beasts only came closer, but despite this, Gundham ran towards the hill. The sparrow in the tree chirped, seeming to encourage him.

The first hellish beast ran past him, inches away from hitting him and trampling him into the dirt.

Gundham began to pant, panicking as more creatures ran past him. He continued to run. He grew closer, closer to the hill…

Gundham let out a cry of pain as a beast trampled over one of his legs. He tumbled onto the ground. No, no, this couldn’t be the end, not now… He had to get up, he needed to get up! But he couldn’t get up on his own, so how could he…

Gundham’s eyes widened, and he grabbed the stick that he’d dropped after his leg had been crushed. He was suddenly grateful that he hadn’t dropped it after the ritual. He took it in his hand and, using it as a crutch, continued to run.

  
Despite the pain, he continued to run.

  
Despite the blood loss, he continued to run.

  
Despite being a murderer, despite deserving death, Gundham continued to run.

He was already near the edges of the stampede, near the hill. If he’d still been where he’d been doing his ritual, in the middle of the stampede, he would’ve been crushed before he could get the stick back.   
  
He was so close.

  
He was so…

Gundham was going uphill now. He charged up the steep hill frantically, the stampede continuing in a straight line bellow him. Despite everything, no beasts tried to follow him up the hill.

  
Gundham panted as he stopped on top of the hill, next to the tree. He leaned against it. The sparrow chirped heartilly.

The stampede bellow him thinned out, before ending.

He had survived.

Gundham blacked out, the pain in his crushed leg overwhelming him.

 

* * *

 

The other seven students watched the display with wide eyes. Was Gundham dead?! No, he wasn’t, he’d only passed out. Gundham had survived. Gundham had survived his execution!

Sonia began to sob. Her friend was alive! Despite the odds, Gundham was alive!   
  
“What?!” Monokuma cried out. “He shouldn’t have survived! That’s… That’s never happened before. What should I do?”

“You must save him!” Sonia pleaded. “Please, he will bleed to death if you don’t do something, you must help him!”   
  
“Why should I?” Monokuma asked. “He was supposed to die anyway, I shouldn’t help him.”   
  
“He survived your execution! He got away from the stampede, he should live! He’s earned it!” Sonia pleaded desperately.

“Gah, fine, I’ll save him.” Monokuma sighed. “But you all owe me a favor!”   
  
A siren began to wail, and an ambulance charged onto the scene.

The other students began to worry. Would Gundham be okay? And if he was, then what? He was a murderer, they couldn’t just ignore that, could they? Should they lock him up like Nekomaru and Kazuichi did with Nagito?

The mechanic began to tremble.

He had made a huge mistake. Everyone was going to question why Monokuma had agreed to save the breeder, surely. That was incredibly out of character! And saving the breeder was useless anyway, no one would ever trust Gundham again. He shouldn’t have given Gundham a chance to survive, it was pointless! This was blatant favoritism, that wasn’t allowed! This was bad.

He’d made a horrible mistake.

But… at least Gundham was alive. Kazuichi continued to tremble.

He was a traitor. He was going against everything Junko had wanted for him.

What was he going to do now…?


	2. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kazuichi panics as a meeting to figure out what the students of Hope's Peak should do with Gundham Tanaka begins. Being forced to face his mistake of letting the breeder live and with his newest error looming above him, he can only hope he won't screw it up.

Everything in the room was quiet and still. Nothing moved, and everything was colored with an almost overwhelming white. Sunlight filtered through the closed window in the room, the curtains being opened to let it through. It almost seemed… peaceful.

 

It was a high pitched beep that ended up breaking this pattern.

 

A twitch, but other than than, no reaction.

 

Another beep, sounding only moments later.

 

What… was that?   
  
It didn’t sound like an alarm clock.

  
Beep.

 

He… He didn’t even set an alarm clock, did he? How long had it been since he’d seen his alarm clock?   
  
Beep.

 

He had been in the Fun House. He didn’t have an alarm clock there… did he? He… couldn’t remember. 

 

Beep.

 

Why was that? His memory was usually pretty good.

 

Beep.

 

His head… it felt fuzzy.

 

Beep.

  
His body… it felt…

 

Beep.

 

Weary… and…

 

Beep.

 

… In pain.

 

Beep.

 

Gundham Tanaka opened his eyes.

 

* * *

 

 

Kazuichi fidgeted nervously. This… was really bad. It was a logical next step to their situation, and in different circumstances, he would’ve applauded his teammates for coming up with such a good plan.

 

But they weren’t exactly his teammates any more, were they? No, now… he was their enemy.

 

Their enemy…

 

Kazuichi couldn’t help but feel something about that phrasing was...  _ wrong _ . He didn’t like being on the opposing team to his fellow Remnants. He longed for the days of comradery. He couldn’t help but hold onto some kind of irrational wish to return to joking, and causing mayhem with his classmates. He longed for everyone to be on the same team again. 

 

But, he would never get those days back.

 

He’d ruined that irreparably already. He’d already killed off many of his former allies. 

 

There was no way to salvage this. The only option was to keep moving forward with the plan. He had to obey Junko’s wishes. If he couldn’t do what she would’ve wanted, he’d be a total failure in every sense of the word.    
  
A failure of a Remnant, and a failure of a friend.

 

So, he had to keep following through with Junko’s plan; he’d made a couple of mistakes, sure, but he could still go through with the plot. He could fix this.

 

But… it hurt to do this. It hurt to act this way. He didn’t want to be the Mastermind anymore. He just wanted to go back to the beginning, he wanted to fix this. But he couldn’t, and that hurt. It was filling him with…

  
Fuck, he didn’t even want to use the word. How crazy was that? Before, he was just as strong of a Remnant Of Despair as everyone else! But now, he was crumbling, and he was crumbling so easily! Why was that? He used to love despair…

 

Right?

  
Did he ever truly enjoy despair…?   
  
Fuck, he didn’t want to think about that. There were more pressing matters at hand.

 

Like what his teammates ~~_ (friends)  _ ~~ were doing right now. 

 

Today, they were holding a meeting to discuss what they should do about the Ultimate Breeder, Gundham Tanaka.

 

The situation was clear, really. In Junko’s killing game, the trials had a very simple system. A person had to be a killer, the blackened, for a trail to take place. If they weren’t discovered to be the blackened, they would escape the killing game and graduate. If they were discovered, they’d be executed.

 

But thanks to Kazuichi’s own stupid actions, something bizarre had occurred. A blackened person, Gundham Tanaka, had escaped his execution.

 

Kazuichi could’ve stopped his plan to save Gundham any time. From adding a hill to the savanna with his machines to sending the robotic sparrow to help him notice it, it was all preventable; Every piece was something he could’ve stopped.

 

But yet, he didn’t. And now, he had to suffer the consequences.

 

And as it turns out, those consequences were currently coming to him in the form of a meeting. A meeting about what to do with Gundham Tanaka.

 

Kazuichi was already certain that this experience was going to be hell.    
  
He’d be constantly reminded of his mistakes, making it harder for him to guarantee that he wouldn’t slip up and say something he shouldn’t. He’d have to be with every remaining student on the island, forcing him to think of how they were once friends.

 

He’d have to think about the state Gundham was in right now. Injured to the point where he might not ever be able to use his leg again, and asleep, as he had been for days. Would he ever wake up?

 

Not to mention what he’d done earlier…

 

Oh god, he didn’t even want to  _ think _ about that. He was such a disappointment. Junko would execute him in the most painful way possible  _ immediately _ if she were here. He should’ve stopped making mistakes after saving Gundham, but no. Instead, he pulled  _ this _ shit.

 

But… maybe, his friends will hate him less for it once they figure out what he’d done. Maybe he’ll be redeemable to them as he is now. Maybe they’ll like him, just for a while, before they inevitably learn the truth…

 

Or maybe they wouldn’t connect him to the event at all.

 

Fuck, this was  _ so _ stupid. He shouldn’t care about what they thought, but he did. And soon, VERY soon, he’d know exactly how they’d react to his latest mistake. 

 

Because now, the meeting was about to start. 

 

They were only waiting on one person to arrive, actually. Kazuichi was sure it wouldn’t take long, though...

 

And surely enough, he was right. Kazuichi noticed footsteps, climbing up the stairs. Speak of the devil.

  
Nagito Komaeda, the Ultimate Lucky Student, had arrived.

 

Kazuichi fidgeted nervously. Yeah, he was officially going to be a problem.

 

Nagito had ended up winning the Ultimate Prize after playing Russian Roulette in the funhouse. Unfortunately, that prize was a list of student files, including files from after the students became members of the Ultimate Despair. And, after seeing what everyone really was, Nagito had lost all faith in the Ultimates.

 

It… Kind of made Kazuichi sad, to be honest. It was a shame that he had to see that. Despite how… unorthodox he was, Kazuichi still thought of Nagito as a friend of his. When he wasn’t in the middle of a rant about hope, he wasn’t too bad.

 

But now, who knew what was going on in his head. The figures he’d been looking up to this whole time had turned out to be ruthless, despair-inducing monsters… He must feel terrible.

 

And it seemed that the way he was coping with that was by disrespecting and insulting the Ultimates, particularly Hajime.

 

~~_ (Kazuichi… honestly didn’t like seeing his friends fighting. They’d spew ruthless insults at each other in their days as members of the Ultimate Despair, sure, but this wasn’t the same...) _ ~~

 

~~_ (... Then again, come to think of it, the old days weren’t that great either in that regard.)  _ ~~

 

He bit back a sigh. Just another thing that he’d ruined.

 

“Nagito! You are very late! Where were you?” Sonia asked.

 

“Very late!” Minimaru echoed from across the table, where Akane was sitting.

  
Kazuichi let out an exhausted sigh.

 

“It doesn’t matter.” The lucky student in muttered in response, glaring at the floor and clearly not wanting to be there.

 

Kazuichi frowned to himself.

 

“What? Of course it does! We need to know where-”    
  
“Just drop it.” The mechanic intervened, interrupting the princess.

 

“What?”   
  
“We can talk about that after the meeting. For now, we should start talking about the real reason we’re all here.” He sighed. Sonia looked shocked.

 

It was only after a moment that he realized that he’d broken his character. The version of himself he was pretending to be would never interrupt Sonia and tell her to stop what she was doing. He knew he’d regret it later, but for now, he couldn’t bring himself to care about the surprised faces staring at him.

 

He just wanted to get this over with already.

 

“Nagito”, he addressed the boy, “Please. Take a seat, and you won’t need to be here longer than you need to.”

 

Nagito blinked, looking surprised. But, after a moment, he obeyed, taking his seat in the restaurant.

 

“Alright, good.” The mechanic muttered, relieved. “Let’s begin.”   
  
There was a moment of tense silence. No one moved, nor spoke. Finally, after a moment, someone spoke up.

 

“Alright, how about we go over our ideas one by one? Sonia, you can start.” Hajime asked. Kazuichi was a bit surprised that he’d decided to speak first, but he shrugged it off. Even if he didn’t realize it, Hajime had some pretty strong leadership skills. It made sense for that to present itself occasionally.

 

“Um…” Sonia murmured. “I would really rather not…” 

 

Kazuichi sighed. Now this was more along the lines of what he was expecting. 

 

Sonia was very forgiving, and Gundham was one of her best friends, so obviously she had a bit of a bias for him. She probably just want to keep treating him the same as always. But knowing what the breeder had done… Well, she obviously wouldn’t want to just come right out and say that.

 

Kazuichi sighed again.

 

“Alright, how about we just get a box? We can write down our ideas and put them in anonymously. I guess… Hajime could read them, or something.” Kazuichi announced. Everyone blinked, looking to him in surprise.

 

He knew he was still breaking character quite a bit, and yet he _ still _ didn’t care. He really just wanted to get out of here and hide under his blankets for a while, as immature as he knew that was.

 

“That… isn’t a bad idea.” Hajime decided. No one in the group raised any objections. Thus, Hajime found a box, some pens, and some paper, setting it on the table. He gave a piece of paper and a pen to everyone in the group.

 

Everyone wrote their ideas and put them in the box.

 

“Okay, I’ll read them out now.” Hajime told them. He reached into the box and picked up a piece of paper. He unfolded it, and read what was written on it aloud.

 

“We should leave Gundham in the hospital room. We won’t let him get hurt and we’ll check up on him often, but he won’t be able to move on his own, so he won’t be a threat.” 

 

Kazuichi paused. That… did not sound good.

 

“Wow.” He murmured. 

 

“Um, doesn’t that seem a bit… inhumane?” The Ultimate Princess piped up.

 

“Seems inhumane!” Minimaru echoed loudly.

 

“What? Why is that inhumane?” Fuyuhiko asked, seeming genuinely curious.

 

“Well, we can’t just leave him in there on his own! What if he needs something, and no one is around? And to not be able to move around on his own… that would be like keeping him as a prisoner!” She explained passionately.

 

“But… if he’s, uh, a murderer… isn’t that kind of what he deserves?” Akane spoke quietly. The air became tense, entirely silent aside from the quiet “Deserves?” that Minimaru had repeated.

 

That… was a complicated  question, to say the least.

 

“Uhm, why don’t we just go through the other options before we talk about that? W-We can decide on the best one after.” Kazuichi suggested meekly. Everyone nodded, not being confused by him this time due to his more nervous tone of voice.

 

“Okay, let’s see.” The reserve course student murmured, picking up another paper. “Make Monomi watch Tanaka, so that he can’t do anything bad. If he tries anything, she’ll beat him up.” 

  
There was a moment of silence. 

 

“I’m… not sure if Monomi would be able to actually stop him from doing anything.” Fuyuhiko muttered.

 

“Yeah, but it’d get both of em out of the way, though!” Akane chirped, making it clear that she’d been the one to suggest the idea.

 

“Wha-?! You’re so mean!” Monomi cried out, causing everyone to turn to her, shocked. Since when was she there?!

 

“W-We should just move on.” Hajime announced. Kazuichi nodded, and the other students, and Monomi, followed suit.

 

“We should assign a guard to him. The guard will rotate, and if Gundham is caught doing anything suspicious, we stop him and punish him somehow. We’ll all try to talk to him reasonably, and when we all unanimously agree that he isn’t a threat anymore, we’ll stop supervising him.”

 

Kazuichi blinked. Oh, that one was his.

 

“A guard? Obviously nobody’s going to want to do that.” Nagito objected. 

 

“Well, it said in the paper that the guard would rotate, so it’s not really a matter of volunteers.” The Ultimate Mechanic piped up.

 

“A guard, watching him constantly… he’d never get any privacy.” Sonia murmured, sympathetic. Still, she seemed less opposed to this suggestion than she was to the first one.

 

“Still, it’s not a terrible idea, I think...” Chiaki murmured.

 

“Okay,” Hajime spoke, grabbing another paper. He read the words, or rather, word, written on the paper aloud, and then immediately paled, processing what it actually meant a moment later.

 

“Execution.” 

 

Everyone went dead silent, horrified.

 

“No.” Sonia murmured fearfully.

 

“Definitely not! That’s too far!” Fuyuhiko roared, slamming his fists on the table.

 

“No! Too far!” Minimaru echoed. 

 

“Fuck no, we’re not doing that! Who the hell even wrote that one?!” Kazuichi exclaimed.

 

“D-Did Monokuma put that in there somehow?” Hajime questioned.

 

“He shouldn’t be able to write! I mean, I can’t write, and his hands are exactly like mine…” Monomi explained nervously.

 

“Then who-?” Hajime murmured, before being cut off.

 

“No execution!” Minimaru chirped again.

 

“Well, that we can all agree on, at least.” The Ultimate Gymnast sighed.

 

“Inhumane!” Minimaru exclaimed.

 

Oh boy.

 

“Has it... always remembered things that well?” Chiaki asked quietly.

 

“Well, it is pretty advanced. It’s probably nothing unusual.” Akane answered.

 

“Mmhh.” The robot’s creator hummed nervously, neither confirming nor denying what she’d said. 

 

“Not… what he deserves! No execution, it’s inhumane!” Minimaru tried again.

  
Everyone went silent. That was probably the longest, most coherent sentence Minimaru had spoken so far. Not only that, but it was made of all older bits of their conversation. 

 

“I… don’t want that!” 

 

Okay, NOBODY said that at any point. Everyone’s eyes widened, and they looked to Kazuichi.

 

“I did NOT teach it to do that.” He lied.

  
Here it was. He knew it was coming as soon as he’d walked in today. His second mistake was hitting him like a pile of bricks. 

 

Kazuichi was the one who’d made Nekomaru’s first replacement body. Even though the head was damaged, it wasn’t anything that the Ultimate Mechanic and the creator of the vessel couldn’t fix, despite what he’d told the rest of the group.

 

The truth was, Kazuichi had repaired Nekomaru’s body, essentially reviving him. However, he couldn’t just let him come back; That would be completely unfair. Nekomaru had to suffer some kind of toll, or Kazuichi wouldn’t be able to justify how biased he was being. 

 

Gundham survived his execution, but his leg would probably be unusable forever as his toll. So, Kazuichi decided that to balance out the fact that Gundham had lived, he’d bring Nekomaru back. And to make sure things were somewhat fair, he gave Nekomaru’s new body a toll, too.

 

So, Nekomaru’s robot body was restrained and deactivated in the secret camera room in the Fun House, where no one would ever find him, connected remotely to Minimaru.

 

Nekomaru probably wasn’t even aware that the robot body was still functional. He experienced everything through Minimaru now. The old body was only used to store Nekomaru’s being and memory now, since a system that complex wouldn’t fit inside of Minimaru. 

 

So, Nekomaru had been seeing and hearing everything as Minimaru this whole time.

  
Minimaru had been self aware  _ the whole time. _

 

The only reason why this wasn’t obvious immediately was because it took a lot of energy for Minimaru to speak. So, for a while, Nekomaru couldn’t let  _ anyone _ know the truth.

 

But today, things were different, and Kazuichi knew why immediately. As soon as he’d noticed it, he realized that Nekomaru would reveal himself today. 

 

Akane had brought a portable charger for him.

 

Gundham’s leg was probably unusable, and that was his toll. Nekomaru could barely speak, and that was his toll. But now, Nekomaru would be able to bypass that toll.

 

So, Kazuichi knew that this was coming.

 

“C… Coach Nekomaru?!” Akane cried out, eyes widening.

 

“I am… Nekomaru Nidai!” The tiny robot proclaimed.

 

“Holy shit!” Hajime yelped, disbelieving.

 

“There’s no way… It’s not sentient, there’s no way!” Nagito exclaimed, eyes wide.

 

“I mean, I used some of the parts of Nekomaru’s head to build him, but I never thought that’d be enough to…” Kazuichi trailed off, using the poor excuse he’d practiced to make everyone believe that this wasn’t intentional. 

 

It also happened to be the que that Monokuma needed to enter the room and elaborate.

 

“Yep, that’s right!” The robotic bear proclaimed loudly, turning the room’s attention to him. “The blackened survived his execution, so it wouldn’t be fair if the victim didn’t make it out alive, too!” He grinned.

 

“What?! How is this possible, we all thought that Nekomaru was beyond repair!” Sonia exclaimed. 

 

“As if it would really be that easy to get rid of him! I designed his body, do you really think I’d make him that fragile?” Monokuma chirped, an underlying tone of sarcasm lacing his words.

 

“Why are you doing this?!” Nagito demanded suddenly. “You’ve never been merciful to us before! What’s your motive?!” 

  
“Well, well, well! Getting personal, are we?” He smirked. “That’s none of your business and you know it!” Monokuma told the sickly boy, before dipping out of the room.

 

“Wait!” Hajime cried out, but it was too late.

 

Kazuichi fidgeted with his hands. Good, Monokuma’s AI had made him dodge all further questions, just as planned. His mercy was still obviously suspicious, sure, but that wasn’t of concern yet.

 

So now the only thing left to worry about was the rest of this meeting.

 

“Coach Nekomaru! Is it really you?!” Akane questioned after the initial shock of Monokuma’s departure was gone.

 

“It is I!... Nekomaru Nidai!” He exclaimed in response, seeming to be getting used to speaking.

 

“Wh-what?!” Nagito cried out, his doubts shattered before him.

 

“Returning from my steel grave!” Nekomaru tested.

 

Sonia let out a happy little cry, leaning towards Nekomaru excitedly. It was then that the group first noticed that Nekomaru could move his new eyes. He glanced over to Sonia, seeming to look happy despite the fact that Minimaru barely had any facial features.

 

Akane had tears in her eyes as she smiled at the tiny version of her coach. 

 

“I’m so glad you’re here!” She cried out, eyes glistening happily. “I can’t believe it, you’re really here!”   
  
“I would... never... leave you!” He chirped, seeming to have a bit of trouble with the words.

 

Tears rolled down Akane’s face as she smiled wider. 

 

“W-Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” Hajime asked.

 

“Power supply… can’t speak… easy.” he struggled. It seemed that even though he was plugged into a charger, his ability to speak still deteriorated after a while.

 

“Y-You’ll never have to worry about that again!” Akane promised. “I’ll always make sure to keep you charged up!”

 

“Thank…” Nekomaru tried. 

 

“It’s okay if you can’t always finish your sentences, you know….” Chiaki chimed in. “As long as you can get your point across, it’s fine if you miss a few words… I think.” 

 

“Think!” Nekomaru repeated. “No, thanks.” He corrected himself immediately after. Chiaki chuckled. “Is it easier for you to repeat things?”   
  
“Yes!” He chirped happily. 

 

“Oh! Okay, we’ll keep that in mind, Nekomaru!’ Akane promised. “Thank you.” He forced out.

 

“Easy, take a minute to rest if you need to…” Kazuichi murmured to him, worried that he might end up shutting down with how much he was speaking. And while that would be a mild inconvenience at worst, it’d still put a damper on their reunion. Luckily, Minimaru was designed to charge fast, so he’d be able to talk more as long as he paused a few times.

 

Nekomaru only blinked his eyes in response.

 

“How is this even possible?” The lucky student muttered, looking to Kazuichi for an answer.

 

“Hell if I know!” Kazuichi replied quickly. “I didn’t add any of these features to him! Maybe Monokuma messed with my design while I was asleep!”   
  
“But… why would he do that?” Chiaki asked.

 

“That’s… a good point.” Hajime responded, pausing. 

 

“He must be planning something!” Fuyuhiko growled. Kazuichi shivered.

 

“He did mention that we owed him a favor after that trail…” The mechanic mentioned, hoping to make the bear’s actions seem less out of character.

 

“Shit! You’re right!” Akane exclaimed.

 

“But… what could he possibly be planning for us?” The Ultimate Princess asked worriedly.

 

Everyone in the room paused. Scenarios of all the terrible things Monokuma could try to make them do flashed through the heads of everyone in the room. Well, except the Mastermind’s, obviously.

 

“... That doesn’t matter now!” The gymnast exclaimed after a moment. “What matters is that we have Nekomaru back! We can’t let Monokuma ruin that for us!” 

 

“Yeah… this should be a happy time. We shouldn’t worry about Monokuma any more for now… I think.” The shortest girl in the room murmured. 

 

“There’s no need to stress out over something we can’t fix, I guess.” Hajime added, though he still sounded nervous.

 

No one spoke, as everybody in the restaurant paused to gather their thoughts.

 

“Hey… we never really decided what we should do about Gundham.” Fuyuhiko mentioned after a moment.

 

“Oh yeah, you’re right…” The pinkette muttered nervously. Damn. It looked like they were back to the real purpose of the meeting.

 

“Hey, Nekomaru…” Akane asked. “If you don’t mind me asking, what do you think of all of this?”

 

A heavy silence fell over the room. It had been overlooked before, but now that Akane had mentioned it, it was suddenly obvious; Gundham had murdered Nekomaru, but now, Nekomaru was back. So… what could be going through Nekomaru’s head right now, during this discussion about the man who’d tried to kill him?

 

Nekomaru paused, and after a moment of seemingly thinking, stayed silent.

 

“Hmm…” The Ultimate Gamer hummed thoughtfully. “I think you need to be more specific… that might be hard for him to answer.”

 

“Oh, uh, okay.” Akane responded. “Nekomaru, what do you think about Gundham?”   
  
Nekomaru blinked.

 

“I… forgive him!” He chirped.

 

Nagito’s eyes widened. “What?! You forgive him?!”

 

“I forgive him!” Nekomaru repeated again.

 

Nagito fell silent. How? How was Nekomaru able to forgive Gundham, despite the fact that he had almost killed him, and forced him to be… Like this? Nekomaru, like everyone else here, was a ruthless member of the Ultimate Despair… So how could he possibly be so forgiving?   
  
“... Why?” The lucky student asked.

 

“Fought…” The tiny robot responded. 

 

“What?”

 

“I… Fought. Both fought. Didn’t... Run.” Nekomaru tried to explain. “Stayed. Knew.”

 

Everything was quiet. Nekomaru paused. They must not have understood. He’d need to elaborate.

 

“Knew I’d die. Stayed… Sacrifice.” He finished.

 

Nekomaru’s eyes scanned across the room, taking in everyone’s wide, shocked eyes and surprised faces. If he could still move his mouth, he’d have grinned sadly. It seemed that he’d gotten his point across.   
  


“... N… Nekomaru…” Akane choked out, tears flowing down her face. “T-That’s…”

 

She sniffled, trying her best to pull herself together. 

 

“... You’re really amazing, Nekomaru.” She muttered after a moment. Nekomaru let out a slow, robotic laugh.

 

“E-Easy there… D-Don’t strain yourself.” Kazuichi murmured to the coach. Despite what Gundham had said during the trail, it hadn’t really sunk in how much Nekomaru had sacrificed for them. Maybe it was the shock of the trail, maybe it was the fear of the upcoming execution, but hearing again what Nekomaru had done for everyone again, now...

 

Kazuichi almost growled, frustrated at himself. Why was he so emotional over this?! He shouldn’t be this soft, he was a member of the Ultimate Despair, hell, he was the Mastermind now! So why was he so…?

 

“Th- thank you, Nekomaru…” Hajime spoke after a moment. “I’m… We’re all really glad you’re okay.”   
  


Nekomaru merely blinked at Hajime, unable to say much else for now.

 

The room fell silent as Nekomaru recharged himself a bit. Clearly, everyone had questions, but they also had to prioritize which ones to ask. Everyone took a moment to think about which matters were truly important right now.

  
And that lead to one obvious question.

 

“Hey, Nekomaru… do you think that you can answer one more question for us?” Hajime asked timidly. Nekomaru blinked again, trying to conserve his energy so that he’d be able to answer whatever question Hajime had.

 

Despite his answer being completely nonverbal, Hajime seemed to understand anyway.

 

“Alright, thank you… So Nekomaru, since you’re the one Gundham, uh, hurt… What do  _ you  _ think his punishment should be?”   
  
Nekomaru paused, thinking. He forgave Gundham, sure, but that didn’t mean that the rest of the group would be able to so easily. If they were paranoid about Gundham trying anything, it’d be really stressful for them. Perhaps, if it got bad enough, a real threat could go unnoticed… 

 

So the best option that’d both let Gundham have his freedom and let everyone else be at peace would be…

 

“Guard.” Nekomaru decided. “3rd… Option.”

 

“The third option? You think that’s the best one?” Hajime asked. Nekomaru blinked again. 

 

Kazuichi paused. He felt… Weirdly flattered. Nekomaru really thought that his option was the best one?   
  
“Well,” Kazuichi began. “We haven’t read all of the options yet… Something better might come up, so we might as well check through all of them, right?”  
  
Nekomaru blinked again, which seemed to be an official signal that he agreed.

 

* * *

 

“Well, alright then, that settles it!” Sonia announced. “From now on, the third option will be in place! Gundham will regularly have a guard, the likes of which will rotate!”

 

Hajime let out a quiet whoop, and Kazuichi gave some soft applause. 

 

He couldn’t believe that they’d really picked his option. It made him feel strangely appreciated. 

 

“You are all hereby dismissed!” Sonia proclaimed. Nagito immediately left the room. Kazuichi yawned and stretched. He stood up, and walked out of the building.

 

That went… A lot better than he thought it would, actually. It had taken a while, but at least it was done now. And as soon as Gundham woke up, they’d have a solid plan on how to deal with him…

 

Well,  _ if  _ Gundham woke up.

 

Kazuichi stopped, sighing. He was really being too paranoid about this. There was no way he wouldn’t wake up, he’d survived his execution! If anything was going to kill him it would’ve been that. There’s no way that he’d just die of blood loss after he managed to get away!

 

… Right?

 

The pink haired boy growled to himself. This was stupid, honestly, he shouldn’t care if Gundham ended up dying. That’d be ideal! It’d mean that his mistake would be fixed! And after that, maybe he could take apart Nekomaru to make it even… That’d cause such despair! It’d be perfect!

  
~~  
_ (He did NOT want to do that. Just the thought of it was horrifying, there was no way he’d be able to do that… Screw what Junko would’ve wanted, he WON’T.) _ ~~

 

~~_ (Not again. He won’t hurt his friends again!) _ ~~

 

It wouldn’t matter if Gundham died.

 

It wouldn’t matter if Gundham lived.

 

It wouldn’t matter either way. He didn’t care.

 

_ The only reason he was going to the hospital room now was because he was curious. _

 

That was all. It was okay to be curious. It was suspenseful,  _ thrilling, _ to see what would happen, even if it didn’t truly matter. He was just going to take a look at him, to see if he was recovering. 

 

That’s the only reason that Kazuichi had slowly made his way across the bridge to the central island, and it was the only reason why he’d gone to the third island when he had gotten there. 

 

Kazuichi glanced up, trying to get a hold of himself. There was no use worrying about it, this was fine! He did his best to focus on what was ahead of him. 

 

He made his way to the hospital quietly. He stood outside the door of Gundham’s room for a moment, fidgeting with his hands. Was it really okay to do this…?   
  
… Of course it was! This was fine, he was just curious about what state Gundham was in! It was okay to be curious. It was  _ okay. _

  
Kazuichi stayed still for a moment longer, readying himself. Everything was completely still and silent, except for…

  
Kazuichi froze. From in front of the door, he could hear a drawn out, high pitched tone. It wasn’t stopping. A long, unending beep.

  
The beep of the heart monitor. 

 

Kazuichi panicked. No, no, no! It couldn’t be, there was no way…! He opened up the door, bursting into the room, to see…

 

Gundham Tanaka. Awake, covering his ears and his eyes screwed shut, the wires to the heart monitor strewn out around him.

 

* * *

 

Beep.

 

_ His body was in pain. _

 

Beep.

 

So much pain.

 

Beep.    


  
It was coming from his leg, mostly...

 

Beep. Beep. 

 

Why was it coming from his leg?

  
  
What… What was wrong with it?

  
  
Beep. Beep. Beep.

 

The… The execution…!

 

Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

  
  
He had survived the execution! But his leg…

 

Beep! Beep!

  
  
It had been crushed under the weight of a beast! That’s what had happened! 

 

Beep... Beep…

 

He… Deserved this pain, then.

 

Beep… Beep…

 

He deserved to suffer. As atonement for what he had done.

 

Beep… Beep…

 

He grew quiet for a moment.

 

Beep… Beep… Beep… 

 

… He had to make that stop. The beeping was intolerable.

 

Beep.

 

He deserved to hurt, but wasn’t the physical pain enough? This insufferable beeping was just unnecessary.

 

  
Beep.

 

He was tired. He wanted to go back to sleep, but first, he had to see them. They had to know he was awake.

 

Beep.

 

Gundham Tanaka ripped the wires connecting him to the machine out.

 

A long, unending beep began to sound.

 

He covered his ears groaning.  _ Okay, that wasn’t a good idea. This was officially worse than the regular beeping. _

 

  
He shivered. How did he make this stop? He had to make it stop… But how?

  
  
He almost didn’t hear when someone burst into the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah gosh, I am SO sorry this took so long, seriously. I really didn't like the way I wrote this at first, so I kinda avoided my first draft for way longer than I should have. But it actually wasn't as awful as I thought, so, uh... Oops? I really hope you guys are still interested in this, and enjoyed it despite how long it took. Feel free to leave a comment I guess, thanks for reading!


	3. Repercussions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kazuichi and Gundham have a conversation. But, with the mastermind's resolve slipping, will he say anything he shouldn't? 
> 
> He just didn't want to hurt anyone else...

Kazuichi’s orchid eyes darted around the taller boy, taking in the whole scene.    
  
He was still in his hospital robes, though they seemed to be slightly disheveled, the breeder’s broad chest partially exposed. His hair was strewn about strangely, and his eyes looked bleary; It was obvious he’d just woken up. Though the heart monitor had flatlined, it was quite clear that the game participant was very alive. 

 

So, the only other reason his monitor could be making that noise was…

  
The mechanic’s now-slightly-calmer eyes locked onto the wires around Gundham once more. 

 

… He must’ve ripped them out, then. Of course. 

 

~~_ (Kazuichi felt unspeakably relieved. Not that he’d ever admit that, of course. He was supposed to want the despair of having the excuse to take Nekomaru away again… This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.)  _ ~~

 

~~_ (Nevertheless, he was glad, even if this was, in every sense of the word, a failure on his part.)  _ ~~

 

The aforementioned breeder was holding his hands over his ears, expression torn into a wince. His multicolored eyes were locked soley onto Kazuichi, surprised, and yet clearly still seeming quite annoyed. 

 

~~_ (... The pink-haired boy couldn’t help but hope that annoyance was directed at the heart monitor and not himself…)  _ ~~

 

… Well, he was quite clearly in pain. And, though despair was supposed to be his main objective,  ~~_ (though it certainly wasn’t anymore judging by all the stupid shit he’d done lately,) _ ~~ leaving the other to suffer would be quite out of character, and he’d already acted suspiciously enough today. 

 

Even the facade of a character he’d built around himself wasn’t dumb enough not to notice Gundham’s suffering.    
  
~~_ (... Yes he was. You just want an excuse to help him, admit it.)  _ ~~

 

That, of course, is the only reason he rushed so quickly to unplug the machine, dropping to his knees to disconnect the outlet. He quickly popped back up again, watching Gundham’s expression shift to something more relaxed than before.

  
“Gundham!” The mechanic cried out, making the breeder wince. Using all of the willpower he had, he maintained the same volume level as before, deciding his character to be too dense to notice the other’s quick expression of hurt, shouting out, “Are you okay?!” 

 

“By the nine circles of hell, quiet down…” The breeder groaned, covering his right eye with an annoyed hand, squinting under the hospital’s fluorescent lights. 

 

Now  _ this  _ was a que his character was able to take. 

 

“Sorry!” Kazuichi exclaimed, voice dropping down to a near inaudible whisper. 

 

“Eh…? Not  _ that _ restrained, Sharp Toothed One, no one could hear that, not even one with  _ my  _ ability…” Gundham murmured, sounding more confused this time around. The mastermind bit back a grin.    
  
“Geez, what is it you want me to do?” The shorter sighed with faux-annoyance, shifting to a more average volume. “Is this any better?”    
  
“... That will suffice.” 

 

“Oh, good!” The mechanic grinned. Suddenly, his smile dropped, as he remembered the reason for his visit. He’d gotten so into being able to toy with the taller student again, he’d almost forgotten why he’d come… He supposed not  _ all  _ of the forgetfulness he’d displayed was from his acting. “How’re you feeling…?”    
  
The breeder groaned. “I feel as though I’ve been dragged through the jaws of Pandemonium, only to be spat right back out… Though, in a sense, I suppose I have… I’ve certainly earned this pain…” 

 

Understanding Gundham’s metaphors, despite what he may lead others to believe, wasn’t actually all too hard for Kazuichi to do. In fact, he’d say the most challenging part of being able to speak to Gundham properly would be deciding what would go over his persona’s head and what wouldn’t. Now, though, in this room where only himself and the obviously-disoriented breeder were present? He felt he could let his guard drop, if only slightly. 

 

So, instead of questioning the boy’s fancy wording...

 

“E-Earned this pain…? What do you mean?” He questioned slowly, focusing on Gundham’s intent rather than his ways with his words.   
  
“... Surely even  _ you  _ aren’t dense enough to not understand, mechanic.” The dark-haired student spat. “I’ve committed the most foul of crimes one can in this realm. I’ve taken the life of another, and though I did so for the sake of a greater survival, I most certainly belong amongst the demons nonetheless.” 

 

… Kazuichi was, in fact, able to understand what Gundham meant the first time he said it. What he understood even deeper was the pain the other spoke with, voice thick with leaden emotion, thick with  _ despair _ … It was strange hearing his fellow remnant feel so guilty over a simple murder, but considering circumstance, it made sense. 

 

 He wanted desperately to reassure him of his sympathy, but due to his character, that wasn’t possible yet.

 

Playing dumb, of course, was essential in coming across as incompetent. After all, should he be seen as anything other than incompetent, he’d certainly be put under suspicion. Acting stupid was an easy way to divert attention, as people trusted him enough to assume he’d act suspicious were he planning something. As undesirable as it was, it was quite necessary. 

 

But, playing dumb had it’s perks. Such as, for example, having a smooth segway into being able to tell Gundham the good news about his supposed victim. 

 

“Ohh…” The yellow-clad survivor began, voice thick with a faked realization. “You don’t know yet, of course…” 

 

Gundham squinted suspiciously. “... Know what?” 

 

“Nekomaru, he’s…”    
  
“He’s what?” The other asked, voice beginning to sound desperate. 

 

~~_ (... That pause was just cruel... Sorry, Gundham.) _ ~~

 

“He’s alive.”    
  
“What?! That’s impossible!” The breeder exclaimed, shooting up from his blankets with his eyes wide.    
  
“Woah, woah, easy, you’re still hurt…!” The mechanic yelped, placing his hands on Gundham’s shoulders, careful to touch only what was covered in cloth so as not to  _~~(make the other uncomfortable)~~ _ cause Gundham to spiral into a lecture about his poison skin. 

 

“H-Hey now, sit back, relax…” The beanie-clad Ultimate murmured, pushing at the taller gently. Surprisingly, he complied, leaning back against the headboard.

 

“... What do you  _ mean  _ by ‘He’s alive’? Surely he’s deceased, I saw the ruins of his metallic form with my own eyes... ” The heterochromatic student demanded, a suspicious edge in his tone and a hopeful lacing across his eyes. 

 

“It really seemed that way, huh?” The mechanic started, taking on a thoughtful tone. “But it’s true. He’s really alive.”    
  
“Wh- How?!”    
  
“Well, after everything that happened, I figured Akane was going through a bit of a hard time, so… I sorta built her a little, uh… Toy Nekomaru?” Kazuichi began, the fact that his character had only done this in order to impress Sonia slipping his mind momentarily. “I-It was only supposed to repeat things it heard people say, but… Monokuma musta tampered with my design.” 

 

“S-So… It’s alive?!”    
  
“Yeah, pretty much. Crazy stuff! I have no idea how he managed to pull it off! The thing’s way too small to fit all those important functions, after all. It must be connected to a main server somewhere…” Kazuichi babbled, faking a happy tone and preparing to ramble on using all sorts of complicated mechanical words for as long as Gundham would allow, knowing he wouldn’t be able to understand most of it.

 

“S-So… He’s alive?! Truly alive?!” Gundham interrupted. For a moment, Kazuichi’s expression dropped, annoyed to be cut off so soon, before lifting back into a slight happiness.    
  
“Yep! Just as alive as he was before! Well, he has some issues speaking now, apparently it takes up a lot of energy, but still! No doubt about it, it’s Nekomaru.” The sharp-toothed boy grinned. 

 

“... I see…” The breeder spoke, staring down at his lap with a heavy expression, hunching over. Staring into his dark eyes, Kazuichi tilted his head, a bit confused.    
  
“... Hey, what’s wrong? This is good news, right?” The mechanic asked, genuine curiosity apparent in his voice.

 

“... Even though my victim hasn’t been sentenced to an eternity in the afterlife, I’ve still committed a grave sin. Though Nekomaru may live on, he’ll be forever burdened by my actions, forever impaired due to the things I’ve done…” Gundham spoke, uncharacteristically quiet. 

 

“And yet I’ll continue to live on undeterred, without receiving proper reverberation for my sin, whilst he’s left to a life of damnation…” The white hospital bed sheets were clenched in his hands with an iron grip, expression solemn and mournful.

 

“... U-Uh…” Kazuichi stammered, unsure of how to phrase exactly what he was trying to convey. Gundham looked up at him, expression solemn and eyes practically swirling with despair. “I-I… I wouldn’t say you’re exactly going to, ah… Live on without repercussions…” 

 

“And just what do you mean by that, Sharp-Toothed One?” The bedridden Ultimate questioned. 

 

“W-Well, erm… F-For one, nobody’s going to let you be unsupervised aft-” 

 

“Oh,  _ please _ .” Gundham scoffed. “That’s no proper vindication for my deeds. Were I to escape this foul place, your mistrust would mean nothing. The fact you all won’t put faith in me anymore is merely common sense. But my misdeeds cannot be rectified  _ that  _ easily.” 

 

“U-Um… I know, j-just…” The mastermind stammered, voice dropping to something nearly inaudible. He… Didn’t want to say it. But…

 

“...  _ What?  _ What is it?” 

 

“Th-That’s… Not all…”    
  
“... Then go on?” 

 

“Y-Your… Your leg.” Kazuichi choked. Why…? Why was it so hard to get out the words? It should’ve been simple, obvious. And yet… 

 

“It’s… Fucked up.  _ Really  _ fucked up… I-I’m pretty sure you’ll never be able to use your leg again.” 

 

“...”   
  
“I-... I-I’m sorry…”    
  


The taller boy fell utterly, terrifyingly silent. Kazuichi wasn’t sure whether he wanted to shift uncomfortably or stay still as a statue. The air was unbearably tense, slowly choking out any restraint the mechanic had, making him want to burst into tears.

 

… That was funny… Why should  _ he  _ be crying, anyway? Gundham was the one who’d wind up crippled, and yet here the secretholder was, on the verge of tears. What  _ was  _ this? Pity? … Remorse?    
  
Either way, just as the mastermind almost buckled to the unrealistic desire of simply bolting out of the room, the bedridden Ultimate spoke two quiet, soft words.

 

“... I see.”    
  


Kazuichi froze, shifted a bit, looked at the breeder curiously, and looked away again, very obviously unsure of how to take that. Gundham only stared down at his arms, a dulled look across his eyes. 

 

“It does hurt… Rather badly… But I suppose this is only fair.” He continues. “Though being physically disadvantaged certainly isn’t enough to cleanse the darkness of my soul, I suppose it’s a start… At least I didn’t escape without being damaged myself...” 

 

“... Y-Yeah, I-”    
  
“-But even still, is this merely the beginning of an unrelenting labyrinth of false expectations?”

 

“H-Huh, what?” The shorter stuttered, surprised by the sudden outburst. 

 

“Will I ever be redeemable after what I’ve done, Kazuichi?”    
  
The mechanic paused, choking on his words. Gundham… He’d never heard the other boy so solemn, so serious, humanity bared and all signs of false-grandeur gone. Not to mention the usage of his name, his  _ actual  _ name, in place of one of the eccentric breeder’s usual nicknames…

 

… Yet, quite clearly, this was no time for speechlessness. 

 

“... Lotsa people’ve done terrible things in this world…” The pink-haired figure began, fidgeting with his beanie. “And believe it or not, you’re far from the worst… But even so, the worst of them didn’t just give up and die. If they’d given up after the first tragedy in their life, they’d be gone before they could even become widely known as terrible people… B-But… Maybe instead of continuing on to be the worst, you can… T-Try to use that potential to be the best, instead?” 

 

“... That’s… An awfully optimistic point of view.” Gundham muttered, a hint of confusion in his voice.

 

Kazuichi swallowed hard, struggling to force out the words from around the lump in his throat. “I’m… I-I know… Of all people, I s-shouldn’t be saying this, b-but-”   
  
“No, you bring up a good point, as strangely as you presented it.” The bedridden boy interrupted. “… Giving up on life would be the only clause for utter irredeemability in this world, so despite everything, I must continue on doing my best to fulfill my purpose as the Overlord Of Ice, even if I may feel undeserving…” 

 

“Y-Yeah…” The killer muttered, breathless. “Yeah, that’s right.”

 

A long silence fell over the pure white room. The two Ultimates held faraway looks in their eyes, both clearly deep in thought. 

 

Finally, the taller of the two broke the silence, muttering out a quiet, “Apologies for my rambling. So, is there any other reason you’ve come here, Sharp Toothed One?”    
  
Kazuichi blinked, snapping back to the present. 

  
“O-Oh, right!” He spoke, remembering something. “U-Uh, since you’re awake, you probably wanna know what w-we’re, uh… Up to lately, right?” 

 

“... That wording makes me suspect you have something specific in mind.” 

 

“E-Eheheh… You really can see right through me, huh?” The mastermind chuckled, fully aware of the irony of this statement. “Yeah, we, uh, figured out a plan… About to do with, uh… You…” 

  
“Ah, I see.” The Ultimate sighed. “And what might that be?”    
  
“Guard system. You’re gonna hafta be supervised until we can all trust you won’t hurt us again…”

 

“Until you may all trust in me…” The hospitalized one repeated, an unidentifiable lilt in his voice.

  
“N-N-Not that I don’t already trust you, of course!” The mechanic squeaked, tensing up suddenly. “That’s not what I meant!”    
  
“Huh…?”    
  
“I know you wouldn’t hurt me, th-that’s not what I was implying…!”   
  
“No, no, I’m not offended, but… Why? Why do  _ you _ , of all people, the one who’s trembled the most in the face of the truth of mortality, trust in  _ me, _ who you’ve been broadcasting an obvious distaste in for days on end?” 

 

“O-Oh.” The mastermind paused, eyes widening. Shit. “U-Uh…”

 

He was right. That wasn’t in character at all! Fuck, he’d let himself get too comfortable…! 

 

“This doesn’t make sense…”   
  
“I-It’s just, I-I guess… Hearing about your sacrifice, wh-what you and Nekomaru did for everyone, and remembering how awful I’d been to you, I j-just… I’m so guilty, and… This whole time, you’ve really been a g-great guy, and…” The pink-haired boy stumbled his way through explaining, eyes darting around the room as he came up with excuses as quickly as he could. 

 

He must’ve said something effective, though. Almost  _ too  _ effective, even, seeing how Gundham’s eyes softened so tenderly. A horrible feeling twisted in his gut.

 

“I…” The boy ceased, left breathless, words escaping him. “I’m sorry…” 

 

“... I… Never thought I’d hear such sentiments from you, Tamer Of Automations. I… Thank you, for letting me know.”   
  
“I-I…” Kazuichi trembled. 

 

That expression… That uncharacteristically, uniquely soft expression. Fully relaxed, open, letting Kazuichi understand his innermost feelings. Gentle and understanding, as though the Overlord Of Ice could see his thoughts, too. 

 

Such a soft look…   
  
… A look that should, in no way whatsoever, be directed at someone as amoral as the mastermind. 

 

The pink-haired boy’s heart pounded in his chest. Trust… Trust in him, trust despite his secrets… No. That wasn’t something he deserved.    
  
He racked his mind, searching desperately for something,  _ anything  _ to rectify this.

 

“... Your visit means much to me.” The other continued.  “However, a mere human such as yourself shouldn’t spend such long periods with me, not until you’ve grown adjusted to my dark aura… I have… Much contemplation to do.” 

 

“I-I…” The shaking figure gasped, unable to think of any excuse to stay. “... O-Okay… I’ll go tell the others you’re awake… G-Goodbye, Gundham.” 

 

“Farewell.”    
  
The mechanic stumbled out of the room on shaky legs, closing the hospital door behind him. Slowly, he pressed himself against the wall. 

  
He… He was such a manipulative prick.   
  
But… That wasn’t entirely dishonest, was it…? He really did think Gundham was a great guy, and he did feel a lot of emotions over his sacrifice, but… 

 

… He must’ve touched on something meaningful, some insecurity the other had, something. The bedridden boy clearly felt a lot over what he’d said, if that horrendous expression was anything to go by. He didn’t  _ mean  _ to, though. He didn't mean to inspire that feeling. He didn’t mean to gain his trust.

 

He… Was gonna betray that trust, wasn’t he? Hell, he already had, seven times over. He’d betrayed Gundham’s trust every time another student had died, betrayed  _ everyone _ . For every tear the survivors had shed, he’d shattered any semblance of humanity he held ever further. 

 

No one on the island had really  _ cared  _ about him though. Hajime was the closest he’d had to a friend, and even  _ he  _ seemed obviously-annoyed by his mannerisms. So when he inevitably betrayed them all, he knew he wouldn’t have to worry about tears shed over the person he’d pretended to be.

 

But now… He’d been perceived as more than a bug. He’d been perceived as  _ human _ in the other’s eyes. Would Gundham cry over a pathetic figure like him, just because he was human?

 

… But wasn’t it better if they’d trust him, Gundham and everyone else? Wouldn’t that be more despair-inducing…? 

 

~~_ (... You already know you don’t want that. Why are you denying it, Kazuichi? Why are you denying what soul, what little  _ redeemability  _ you have?) _ ~~

 

No, no… That’s… Not true…! He’d do good! He’d follow Junko’s plan! He had to! And when he did… Everyone… Everyone would hurt.

 

But… He… He loathed to admit it, but he didn’t want to hurt them anymore. Just annoying them, just being able to watch their reactions to his pestering, just spending time with them was enough for him to feel as though they might consider him a friend. Just being able to be around them was enough for his wish fulfillment. It was just enough to feel  _ alive _ .

 

But for them to truly care… As flattering as it may be, he knew it’d only hurt them. He had to make sure they didn’t see any good in him anymore, he  _ had  _ to…! 

 

… He wouldn’t do that again. He wouldn’t try to be sincere or comforting to any of them. He’d double down.

  
Never again. He’d never break character around the islanders again.

  
He couldn’t let them trust him.

 

So, shakily, the pink-haired student continued forward, ignoring the clench in his jaw.

  
  


* * *

  
  


The student stood quietly in his room, staring under his bed with despair-ridden eyes. He knew it was incredibly dangerous to keep such a wide array of explosives where he slept, but he couldn’t chance anyone finding them. Besides, he trusted his luck to keep them from exploding. 

  
He’d planned to implement his plot to weed out the traitor sooner. However, what with the unexpected turn the execution had taken… He wanted to see. He wanted to see what the lowly servants of despair had to say about it. 

 

And when Hajime had found him and told him about the meeting they were holding the next day, before he’d had the chance to solidify his resolve, well… He couldn’t help but want to see for himself how ruthless the students may be. Call it closure, call it curiosity, it didn’t matter.

 

… He didn’t at all expect the return of Nekomaru, though. And more concerningly was the faux-kindness, the strange sense of morality, the Remnants had exhibited. How could they act so kindly considering the things they’d done, the horrid despair they’d believed in? 

 

Most curiously was Monokuma’s absence… He’d expected that surely, some big announcement would be made with them gathered together, and yet he’d only appeared ever-so-briefly. He hadn’t expected another motive yet, but still, he’d expected more than  _ that _ .

 

… He knew, logically, he shouldn’t wait any longer, lest Monokuma try to implement his own motive before he had a chance to present his idea. Yet he still felt endlessly tormented by the torrent of questions… 

 

So he wanted to do just one more thing before the End of Jabberwock Island. He wanted to question the near-killer himself.

  
Surely he felt despair more deeply than any of the other students living now… So he needed to question his motives. He needed to know what was going through the minds of these betrayers of hope, these forsakers of good… Then he’d be able to go on without remorse. 

 

One more day. He’d wait for Gundham to awaken for just one more day. 

 

So, rising from his knees and away from his stash of weapons, Nagito Komaeda resolved to get to the bottom of this. 


End file.
